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The reason why you will find yourself struggling in a dubious relationship is because you believe the relationship to be more than what it is (or want it to be more than what it is) – you’re trying to operate as a team with lazy or reluctant team mate.
That so-called team mate doesn’t see the relationship in the same way.
When you build your existence on another person and effectively have the sun rising and setting on them, it creates an unhealthy balance and puts a huge amount of pressure on the relationship and the other person because you have no personal security.
I regularly ask people what their interests are, what they desire, what their goals are etc and most of them have become lost in the other person and have lost touch with what they want.
A week or two later he started to act really cold, not texting or phoning me unless I did it first.
He would only see me once a week because he said he was busy (which he was).
I’ve written volumes about this phenomenon and don’t think there’s much to add to that discussion.
That’s not to be a killjoy; that’s so that you enjoy a real relationship but are also aware of when things have shifted significantly enough for you to sanity check your decision to be with the other party.